LEVER ACTION SHOOTERS SOCIETY - What we need here is some humor!

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Dec 11, 2009, 9:22pm

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LEVER ACTION SHOOTERS SOCIETY :: WINCHESTER LEVER-ACTION FORUM :: LEVER ACTION SHOOTERS SOCIETY :: What we need here is some humor!

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Topic: What we need here is some humor! (Read 94 times)

kidsopris
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What we need here is some humor!
« Thread Started on Jul 30, 2009, 9:27am »

COWBOY BOOTS

An elderly couple, Ray and Bessie, recently moved to Texas. Ray has always
wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. Seeing some on sale one day, he
buys them and wears them home. Walking proudly into the house, he says to his wife, "Notice anything different about me?" Bessie looks him over, "Nope."

Frustrated, Ray storms off into the bathroom, undresses, and walks back into the room completely naked except for the boots. Again, he asks, a little louder this time, "Notice anything different now?"

Bessie looks up and says, "What's different Ray? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, and it'll be hanging down again tomorrow!"
Furious, Ray yells, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT IS HANGING DOWN, BESSIE? IT'S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW COWBOY BOOTS!!!!!!"

To which Bessie replies, "Shoulda bought a hat, Ray. Shoulda bought a hat."

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DUKE NUKEM
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Re: What we need here is some humor!
« Reply #1 on Jul 30, 2009, 1:34pm »

Humor is always good.

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Stillwater
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Re: What we need here is some humor!
« Reply #2 on Oct 25, 2009, 1:46am »

Humor is what keeps me going, when the going gets tough.

Bill

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A fool enters into contention and his mouth calls for strokes - Proverbs 18:6

bgdoc44
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Re: What we need here is some humor!
« Reply #3 on Nov 6, 2009, 5:52pm »

javascript:add("%20;D")In Abelane a bunch of cowboys were in a bar when a farmer walked in. The place got real quiet when the farmer ask for a beer to cut the dust. One cowboy wearing his gun tied down and ready said hey farmer how would you like dance? With that he pulled his 45 and started to shoot at the farmers feet. He emptied his right gun pulled his hideout and emptied it too! He turned to his friends and said boy he sure was a poor dancer, getting great laughs from all and more comments, more laughs. Suddenly it got real quite the gunslick turned really slow when he heard the sound of hammers cocking. There was the farmer holding a old greener both barrels covering him. The old farmer said hey boy did you ever kiss a mules butt? Gunslick looked at the 10 guage looked at the farmer and said no but I've always wanted to!! (Ride Boldly Ride) Doc

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muleequestrian
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Re: What we need here is some humor!
« Reply #4 on Nov 6, 2009, 8:51pm »

BOTH were funny stories ! HAHAHA I got to remember the farmer joke, since I do have mules !

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Southern boy lost in Yankee occupied territory

limey
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Re: What we need here is some humor!
« Reply #5 on Nov 17, 2009, 12:47pm »

A new, young and very attractive police woman started at the local police station.

On her first day the desk sargent tells her she will be out on foot patrol with the stations dog handler and his best dog....just so she can get to know the neigbourhood and it's fellons well before she goes out on patrols by herself.

Anyway, 15 minutes into the patrol the young police woman suddenly shivers.....

''Whats up?''....asks the dog handler

''I was in such a hurry when I left the station I forgot to put my panties back on ''

''No worries'' says the dog handler....''This dog is the best there is''........''Just let him have a quick sniff of your lady bits and he will run back to the station, find your panties and bring them back to you in less than 5 minutes''......

''Ok'' she says....so the dog sticks his nose up her skirt, takes a good sniff.....and with that he gone like a fighter jet on full afterburn.....

The dog handler and the police woman carry on walking and in just 5 minutes they hear the dog running back at full speed behind them......they turn, look....and see the dog.......

.....with the desk sargents hand in it's mouth!

Laughter, the best medicine in the world,

Safe shooting

Limey

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